Saturday, August 11, 2007

A few Ideas to Make the World A Better Place

Before even considering running for office every would-be politician should be forced to do a 200 word review of at least 10 books they have read in their lifetime. This should be done from memory and under strict supervision of at least 5 stern old librarians, with their hair up in buns and sporting bi-focal spectacles, reading over their shoulders. A time limit should also be set for the completion of this task as politicians are known procrastinators.
Severe penalties for failure of this selection should be implemented as to deter the dregs of society that normally consider politics as a career to try and pull a fast one. Public execution by means of disembowelment with a blunt wooden spoon comes to mind.

This suggestion will make for a better society as it will cut out a lot of crap politicians normally get away with. Some of the things it will ensure are the following:

There will be proof that the individual can actually read and write.
A thorough examination of the memory of the said individual will be conducted as to eliminate the “ailment” politicians seem to suffer from at any given time during their term of public office i.e. amnesia. This is of quite some importance when it comes to fulfilling promises made during election campaigns.
They will be able to write their own speeches and thus save on tax-payer’s money as to cut out a few of the lackeys normally part of the entourage of a person in office.
Individuals like Mangosuthu ("Gatsha") Ashpenaz Nathan Buthelezi will get so carried away with this task that they will be kept out of the public eye for years to come.
A lot of individuals will be eliminated by this process as any reference, hint or quote to and from Asterix, Tin-Tin and Superman should lead to immediate disqualification. The same applies for works of Robert Suresh Roberts and Dan Roodt.
Proper appointments to cabinet positions can be made based on the contents of the individual’s library:
The Minister for Safety and Security should have at least 3 book covering law and order and not base his expertise on watching soap operas on TV.
The Minister for Health’s library should sport at least the Reader’s Digest version of “Home Doctor.” Herbal remedies and traditional healers do not count!
In turn the minister for Finance should know the currency used by 5 different countries by heart. Double-entry Italian book-keeping might be too much to ask for. (The oldest known form of financial accountability)

God, what a novel idea! I would vote for any political party that implements this selection process in a flash. How wonderful it would be to be governed by people that passed this simple test instead of the current ignorant oafs.

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