Tuesday, August 14, 2007
By The Way
I see that ronald suresh roberts have come up for air long enough to respond to his critics.
General Information
I have made an executive decision for this blog. Henceforth I will not use or tolerate the use of uppercase when referring to the african national congress or any of their political leaders as well as others that irritate me. I believe that this practise leads to undeserved credit. This should be seen as the first guideline for comments on this blog.
How to Recognise a Swede Part 3
1. They really do want to attend the Nobel Prize Dinner.
2. They get really pissed off when Norwegians state that the Nobel peace prize is much more famous than the other Nobel prizes.
3. They all silently believe that Norway is just another province of Sweden that was granted country status to stop them complaining.
4. They get seriously sentimental when entering an IKEA store, outside the borders of Sweden.
5. They claim they are not royalist but actually do care what "she" will wear on the Nobel Prize dinner.
6. They know the names of a multitude of IKEA items.
7. They know how to pronounce these names and sigh when non-Swedes don't.
8. They don't really care about winning as long as Sweden beats Norway and Finnland, no matter what the contest.
9. They know that Sweden will never win the World Cup in football but keep partying anyway.
10. They are prone to stand in line without complaining
2. They get really pissed off when Norwegians state that the Nobel peace prize is much more famous than the other Nobel prizes.
3. They all silently believe that Norway is just another province of Sweden that was granted country status to stop them complaining.
4. They get seriously sentimental when entering an IKEA store, outside the borders of Sweden.
5. They claim they are not royalist but actually do care what "she" will wear on the Nobel Prize dinner.
6. They know the names of a multitude of IKEA items.
7. They know how to pronounce these names and sigh when non-Swedes don't.
8. They don't really care about winning as long as Sweden beats Norway and Finnland, no matter what the contest.
9. They know that Sweden will never win the World Cup in football but keep partying anyway.
10. They are prone to stand in line without complaining
Monday, August 13, 2007
A Tyrant, Ducktails and Black People (1960)
Excerpt no 3: Africa Will Always Break Your Heart
...This is where I got exposed to black people for the first time. I used to sneak off to the wood-mill and join four black labourers over lunch every day. They used to cook their lunch over a small fire in two kafferpots. Kafferpots (still called that today) are black, cast-iron, three-legged cooking pots to be used exclusively over an open fire. It is even one of the export products of Africa. It was without exception putu-pap and meat. Putu-pap is a very stiff maize porridge cooked with very little water and left to steam for hours. I am a master at cooking this porridge after years of practice. The labourers would start to cook their lunch as soon as they arrived at work in the morning, as the putu-pap took a few hours to be cooked just right. The fact that we could not understand each other did not harm our relationship. Every day I got a handful of pap and a piece of meat from them and sat around the fire together with them, listening to them talking in their language.
They would talk very loudly and laugh a lot. These visits were done in secret as we were forbidden to fraternise with black people and the dangerous machinery of the mill was also off-limits. I was taught that black people were dangerous, they stank and they were liars, thieves and murderers. My mom got suspicious since I wasn’t hungry at lunch time and soon found out about my daily excursions. I got a serious trashing and I could not understand why. I can now understand that it was fear bred out of ignorance on her behalf and that she just wished to protect me from harm.
Here I have to confess that black people used to smell a bit but what was lost on me was the reason. And the reason was definitely not that they had some kind of resistance against washing. It rather depended on them being forced to live under conditions that can only be described as inhuman. They erected and lived in squatter shacks close to the white population, as we were their only chance for employment. As many as twelve persons would live in a little shack, no larger than 12 square meters. There was no running water. Townships were informal settlements that only got granted the most basic infrastructure two to three decades later. They cooked their meals over open fires. The only source of heat in winter was an indoor fire without even the luxury of a proper fireplace. Salaries were kept to a minimal and didn’t allow for any improvement of living conditions. The little bit of money they earned was used to feed themselves and to send home to their loved ones living in kraals in the traditional rural areas. Blacks were mostly migrant workers forced to move to the large concentrations of whites, as subsistence farming in their kraals did not produce enough for all. A standard racist joke for years was:
“Why do kaffers stink? The blind must be able to hate them as well.”
That this migrating workforce turned out to be one of the major causes for the spreading of AIDS became knowledge only much later.
Blacks only existed in the periphery of our world. They worked for us, but we were not exposed to them. That fact that there were millions of them never crossed my mind. We were taught that we were superior to them and that they did not amount to much. They did not belong here. This was our land and we were taught at school how our forbearers fought for it. The blacks were jungle bunnies that would never be a factor to consider.
The only other type of people that existed apart from us was duck-tails. Ducktails did not cut their hair. They greased it down with bryll-cream and combed it into a little ducktail at the back. They wore leather jackets and very tight stovepipe jeans that took hours to put on and always carried knives. Ducktails drove around on motorcycles and beat up innocent people. All of them smoked dagga and were the trash of the white population. They were different to us. We had to avoid them and avoid becoming like them.
I remember walking into a café in Irene a few years later, where I saw my first real ducktail. In awe of being so close to danger I ogled him for a long time as he was buying cigarettes. He had all the hallmarks of a true ducktail; slicked down hair, a leather jacket with chains and studs and stovepipe jeans. I looked for the bulge of his flick knife in his back-pocket, but could not detect any. The fact that he left on a bicycle and was most probably a wannabe who could not afford his own motorcycle did not diminish the ‘peril’ I had been in. I remember talking about this incident for days...
...This is where I got exposed to black people for the first time. I used to sneak off to the wood-mill and join four black labourers over lunch every day. They used to cook their lunch over a small fire in two kafferpots. Kafferpots (still called that today) are black, cast-iron, three-legged cooking pots to be used exclusively over an open fire. It is even one of the export products of Africa. It was without exception putu-pap and meat. Putu-pap is a very stiff maize porridge cooked with very little water and left to steam for hours. I am a master at cooking this porridge after years of practice. The labourers would start to cook their lunch as soon as they arrived at work in the morning, as the putu-pap took a few hours to be cooked just right. The fact that we could not understand each other did not harm our relationship. Every day I got a handful of pap and a piece of meat from them and sat around the fire together with them, listening to them talking in their language.
They would talk very loudly and laugh a lot. These visits were done in secret as we were forbidden to fraternise with black people and the dangerous machinery of the mill was also off-limits. I was taught that black people were dangerous, they stank and they were liars, thieves and murderers. My mom got suspicious since I wasn’t hungry at lunch time and soon found out about my daily excursions. I got a serious trashing and I could not understand why. I can now understand that it was fear bred out of ignorance on her behalf and that she just wished to protect me from harm.
Here I have to confess that black people used to smell a bit but what was lost on me was the reason. And the reason was definitely not that they had some kind of resistance against washing. It rather depended on them being forced to live under conditions that can only be described as inhuman. They erected and lived in squatter shacks close to the white population, as we were their only chance for employment. As many as twelve persons would live in a little shack, no larger than 12 square meters. There was no running water. Townships were informal settlements that only got granted the most basic infrastructure two to three decades later. They cooked their meals over open fires. The only source of heat in winter was an indoor fire without even the luxury of a proper fireplace. Salaries were kept to a minimal and didn’t allow for any improvement of living conditions. The little bit of money they earned was used to feed themselves and to send home to their loved ones living in kraals in the traditional rural areas. Blacks were mostly migrant workers forced to move to the large concentrations of whites, as subsistence farming in their kraals did not produce enough for all. A standard racist joke for years was:
“Why do kaffers stink? The blind must be able to hate them as well.”
That this migrating workforce turned out to be one of the major causes for the spreading of AIDS became knowledge only much later.
Blacks only existed in the periphery of our world. They worked for us, but we were not exposed to them. That fact that there were millions of them never crossed my mind. We were taught that we were superior to them and that they did not amount to much. They did not belong here. This was our land and we were taught at school how our forbearers fought for it. The blacks were jungle bunnies that would never be a factor to consider.
The only other type of people that existed apart from us was duck-tails. Ducktails did not cut their hair. They greased it down with bryll-cream and combed it into a little ducktail at the back. They wore leather jackets and very tight stovepipe jeans that took hours to put on and always carried knives. Ducktails drove around on motorcycles and beat up innocent people. All of them smoked dagga and were the trash of the white population. They were different to us. We had to avoid them and avoid becoming like them.
I remember walking into a café in Irene a few years later, where I saw my first real ducktail. In awe of being so close to danger I ogled him for a long time as he was buying cigarettes. He had all the hallmarks of a true ducktail; slicked down hair, a leather jacket with chains and studs and stovepipe jeans. I looked for the bulge of his flick knife in his back-pocket, but could not detect any. The fact that he left on a bicycle and was most probably a wannabe who could not afford his own motorcycle did not diminish the ‘peril’ I had been in. I remember talking about this incident for days...
South Africa: The Week That Was: No 1
Posted on BNNThe only good thing that saw the light in South Africa this week was the Mail & Guardian cartoon by Zapiro.
Headlines in most of the newspapers were dominated by the sacking of The Deputy Minister for Health, Nozizwe Madlala-Routledge. Government officials tendered various reasons for this move and all the versions have the distinct slant of character assassination. We have all now learnt that, that will be the only reaction to any valid criticism of the ANC but lets wade through all the bull-dust of political double-speak and get down to the root cause of her sacking. Madlala-Routledge, as a reasonable, intelligent human being, at some stage, questioned, Manto Tshabalala-Msimang, the Minister of Health’s, “well-researched” cure for AIDS i.e. beetroot and garlic. This article proves it. Sunday Times.
The Minister has a record of abuse of power and various medical sources have hinted at a serious drinking problem but let’s leave it at that as South African politicians are not known to have any human frailties. I did not find mention of any AIDS mortalities in the same newspapers during this period. Hundreds of thousands people dying from a sick government policy does not seem to count. You will remember that Thabo Mbeki, in an interview with the Washington Post in 2003, said: “Personally, I don’t know anybody who has died of Aids.” Sunday Times.
One has to admire him for his tenaciousness.
My question still remain: When do these people find the time to actually try and govern the country? They seem to be extremely busy with defending their seats of power.
As if it is not common knowledge one headline reads: Police are now part of the problem, not the solution. Sunday Times
To illuminate South Africa’s callousness towards violence, a motorist who shot a taxi driver in the face, after being rear-ended by one of these death-traps, gained tremendous support on 702 talk radio for his action. That is not the fault of society but illustrates how the human body will develop a defence mechanism after being exposed to continuous and out of control violence and lack of measures to combat it. Sunday Times.
Slight pressure has being exerted against Mbeki to act against Robert Mugabe but as we all know nothing will come from it. Sunday Times.
And one can even find some sane people in the ANC leadership trying to address crime. I’m not holding my breath until something actually happens. Sunday Times.
The biggest Afrikaans Sunday newspaper has come up with a novel idea on how to handle the bizarre political situation in South Africa. They totally ignore it. No mention of the political antics is made on their main page.
Whereas the old voice of reason, The Mail & Guardian, carries in depth articles on all the happenings. Even one where the one of my old gripes is now addressed i.e. the lack of prosecutions as result of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission’s investigations. I however doubt that timing to do so is now right and I am of the opinion that this is a smoke screen and an effort to hide incompetence by tackling one of the easiest problems first. Health Care and Policing should have the highest priority.
The Boere, I mentioned before, is going to see this as proof of a “politically orchestrated campaign” to annihilate them and that is tantamount to scratching in a lion’s rectum, in the wild, with a very short stick.
And as usual the lack of military involvement in any atrocities is glaring. Also don’t come with that old horse manure of F. W. De Klerk not knowing at the time. He served on the State Security Council as Minister for Education and was co-opted into most of the meetings as minutes of meetings, in possession of the TRC, proves. He, as a lot of others, did not want to know.
The United Kingdom has once more been blamed for the current situation in Zimbabwe by South Africa. Mail & Guardian.
Once again. If politicians can come up with excreta like this, when do they find the time to govern?
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
Slight pressure has being exerted against Mbeki to act against Robert Mugabe but as we all know nothing will come from it. Sunday Times.
And one can even find some sane people in the ANC leadership trying to address crime. I’m not holding my breath until something actually happens. Sunday Times.
The biggest Afrikaans Sunday newspaper has come up with a novel idea on how to handle the bizarre political situation in South Africa. They totally ignore it. No mention of the political antics is made on their main page.
Whereas the old voice of reason, The Mail & Guardian, carries in depth articles on all the happenings. Even one where the one of my old gripes is now addressed i.e. the lack of prosecutions as result of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission’s investigations. I however doubt that timing to do so is now right and I am of the opinion that this is a smoke screen and an effort to hide incompetence by tackling one of the easiest problems first. Health Care and Policing should have the highest priority.
The Boere, I mentioned before, is going to see this as proof of a “politically orchestrated campaign” to annihilate them and that is tantamount to scratching in a lion’s rectum, in the wild, with a very short stick.
And as usual the lack of military involvement in any atrocities is glaring. Also don’t come with that old horse manure of F. W. De Klerk not knowing at the time. He served on the State Security Council as Minister for Education and was co-opted into most of the meetings as minutes of meetings, in possession of the TRC, proves. He, as a lot of others, did not want to know.
The United Kingdom has once more been blamed for the current situation in Zimbabwe by South Africa. Mail & Guardian.
Once again. If politicians can come up with excreta like this, when do they find the time to govern?
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Current Affairs South Africa
Posted on BNN
I felt it necessary to make one more post in general about the current situation in South Africa before I embark on my weekly “political analyses.” The reasons will become clear with this post. I will also discuss the category under which these posts have been made with the administrators of the site as I fear that “humor” might deduct from the significance of these events. As result of Jonn’s comment on my previous post I am addressing two distinct camps as well as a few other issues.
The ANC politicians, mostly people that were in exile during the struggle, who should have remained in the host countries because they are not earnest in their efforts of governing South Africa. They have lost sight, the smell, the sound and the very nature of South Africa locked away in their palatial offices protected by an entourage of bodyguards and brown-nosed advisors. They all secretly know that this state of affairs can not last and are merrily filling up their bank accounts for the eventual and guaranteed axe that will fall. When forced into the public eye because of exposed corruption, incompetence and criminal activity they will, without fail, end up with both feet firmly in their mouths.
It is rather impressive to see how quickly some freedom fighters went from being just that and turned into wealthy businessmen and/or politicians. In this fast advancement they seem to have forgotten what it was they were fighting for. Even I have read The Freedom Charter which, just as a by the way is not a bad document at all, and I am just wondering what happened to those fundamental rights proclaimed in it.
The PC Liberals that supported these oafs during the struggle and now cling onto a dream that have been proven over and over that its just pie in the sky i.e. a free and just South Africa for all. Like communists the world over, who needed intensive counselling when the wall came down, these people tenaciously cling to old beliefs and causes because they have no other valid reason for existence. They merrily propagate anti-white sentiments because that is all they know and they do this with the full knowledge and understanding that it can lead to genocide. They secretly hope that they will be spared when the “night of the long knives” actually does take place. In my mind that amounts to premeditated murder on a full-blown scale.
I’m not pro-apartheid and my book is valid proof of this. I will also never retract what I’ve written but to have generation after generation account for the sins of the fathers because their heroes have no aims, goals, visions or objectives and have to resort to bashing any sane critic as to hide their shortcomings, borders on criminal insanity. I’m also not pro having the most beautiful country in the world being governed by greedy, ignorant and incompetent oafs. I can not sit back and do nothing because I am safe in Sweden when my family, friends and kind are being slaughtered by incompetence. In a democracy it’s every citizen’s right to be protected by law enforcement. Why then are the average South African denied this basic human right and everyone turns a blind eye to their predicament?
The rest of the World’s attitude remains “the more we ignore this embarrassment, the higher the possibility of it going away.” I have news for you. It won’t go away and you will be judged for your indifference. Let me once again quote Dante Alighieri for you “The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who in times of great moral crisis maintain their neutrality.”
“But, how do we get involved?” you may ask. The answer is so simple that it might surprise some. The same way that sane people got rid of the monster called apartheid. By forming pressure groups, like the anti-apartheid movement, and forcing your politicians to take an official stance on corruption and incompetence. Trade sanctions and cutting off international aid might not be a bad idea as a start.
Cutting off Aid? No I’m not insane. Let me explain the realities on the ground. Solidarity movements and non-governmental organisations owe their livelihood, existence and continued employment of members based on your contributions. They have done a sterling job in the past and in most cases still do (and I’m not referring to organisations like the International Red Cross or World Food Aid Program here) but there are a few that don’t tell you the whole truth. The facts of the matter are that your well-meant contributions never get close to the intended target.
Let’s take contributions towards AIDS sufferers as one example. In South Africa, the ruling party, the ANC, made it government policy, soon after they came to power, that all non-governmental funding should be channelled through the government. Read that again as, as ludicrous as it might sound, it’s true. That means that the politicians, I’m so critical about, control where your contributions go. I would really like to hear of any other reason for this than the one I have in mind. It is also government policy not to supply anti-retroviral drugs to HIV positive people and AIDS sufferers. Pray tell then…why do you contribute? The people afflicted with this horrible disease will die, without dignity or care, in any event no matter how many millions you pump in out of the goodness of your hearts.
If you want to contribute to a worthwhile cause, try the Sexually Abused Children in South Africa. No politician can get their grubby paws on this one.
It is not surprising that some solidarity movements don’t tell you the truth because some still maintain that Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe is a misunderstood saint. They have to, else they are without a cause and thus unemployed.
Do not wait for yet another 3 million mortalities before you act. It is time to wipe the slate clean and not to see the ANC as the lesser of two evils that should be accommodated because there is no alternative. There is. It’s called true democracy with political accountability. This can be monitored and implemented by the rest of the civilised world if the leaders, as is now the case, are incapable of doing so. The same applies for defunct non-governmental organisations. Their cause is long dead in history and your donations keep them alive.
I felt it necessary to make one more post in general about the current situation in South Africa before I embark on my weekly “political analyses.” The reasons will become clear with this post. I will also discuss the category under which these posts have been made with the administrators of the site as I fear that “humor” might deduct from the significance of these events. As result of Jonn’s comment on my previous post I am addressing two distinct camps as well as a few other issues.
The ANC politicians, mostly people that were in exile during the struggle, who should have remained in the host countries because they are not earnest in their efforts of governing South Africa. They have lost sight, the smell, the sound and the very nature of South Africa locked away in their palatial offices protected by an entourage of bodyguards and brown-nosed advisors. They all secretly know that this state of affairs can not last and are merrily filling up their bank accounts for the eventual and guaranteed axe that will fall. When forced into the public eye because of exposed corruption, incompetence and criminal activity they will, without fail, end up with both feet firmly in their mouths.
It is rather impressive to see how quickly some freedom fighters went from being just that and turned into wealthy businessmen and/or politicians. In this fast advancement they seem to have forgotten what it was they were fighting for. Even I have read The Freedom Charter which, just as a by the way is not a bad document at all, and I am just wondering what happened to those fundamental rights proclaimed in it.
The PC Liberals that supported these oafs during the struggle and now cling onto a dream that have been proven over and over that its just pie in the sky i.e. a free and just South Africa for all. Like communists the world over, who needed intensive counselling when the wall came down, these people tenaciously cling to old beliefs and causes because they have no other valid reason for existence. They merrily propagate anti-white sentiments because that is all they know and they do this with the full knowledge and understanding that it can lead to genocide. They secretly hope that they will be spared when the “night of the long knives” actually does take place. In my mind that amounts to premeditated murder on a full-blown scale.
I’m not pro-apartheid and my book is valid proof of this. I will also never retract what I’ve written but to have generation after generation account for the sins of the fathers because their heroes have no aims, goals, visions or objectives and have to resort to bashing any sane critic as to hide their shortcomings, borders on criminal insanity. I’m also not pro having the most beautiful country in the world being governed by greedy, ignorant and incompetent oafs. I can not sit back and do nothing because I am safe in Sweden when my family, friends and kind are being slaughtered by incompetence. In a democracy it’s every citizen’s right to be protected by law enforcement. Why then are the average South African denied this basic human right and everyone turns a blind eye to their predicament?
The rest of the World’s attitude remains “the more we ignore this embarrassment, the higher the possibility of it going away.” I have news for you. It won’t go away and you will be judged for your indifference. Let me once again quote Dante Alighieri for you “The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who in times of great moral crisis maintain their neutrality.”
“But, how do we get involved?” you may ask. The answer is so simple that it might surprise some. The same way that sane people got rid of the monster called apartheid. By forming pressure groups, like the anti-apartheid movement, and forcing your politicians to take an official stance on corruption and incompetence. Trade sanctions and cutting off international aid might not be a bad idea as a start.
Cutting off Aid? No I’m not insane. Let me explain the realities on the ground. Solidarity movements and non-governmental organisations owe their livelihood, existence and continued employment of members based on your contributions. They have done a sterling job in the past and in most cases still do (and I’m not referring to organisations like the International Red Cross or World Food Aid Program here) but there are a few that don’t tell you the whole truth. The facts of the matter are that your well-meant contributions never get close to the intended target.
Let’s take contributions towards AIDS sufferers as one example. In South Africa, the ruling party, the ANC, made it government policy, soon after they came to power, that all non-governmental funding should be channelled through the government. Read that again as, as ludicrous as it might sound, it’s true. That means that the politicians, I’m so critical about, control where your contributions go. I would really like to hear of any other reason for this than the one I have in mind. It is also government policy not to supply anti-retroviral drugs to HIV positive people and AIDS sufferers. Pray tell then…why do you contribute? The people afflicted with this horrible disease will die, without dignity or care, in any event no matter how many millions you pump in out of the goodness of your hearts.
If you want to contribute to a worthwhile cause, try the Sexually Abused Children in South Africa. No politician can get their grubby paws on this one.
It is not surprising that some solidarity movements don’t tell you the truth because some still maintain that Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe is a misunderstood saint. They have to, else they are without a cause and thus unemployed.
Do not wait for yet another 3 million mortalities before you act. It is time to wipe the slate clean and not to see the ANC as the lesser of two evils that should be accommodated because there is no alternative. There is. It’s called true democracy with political accountability. This can be monitored and implemented by the rest of the civilised world if the leaders, as is now the case, are incapable of doing so. The same applies for defunct non-governmental organisations. Their cause is long dead in history and your donations keep them alive.
Make the World A Better Place: Part 2
In my previous post I covered a few thoughts on how to handle would-be politicians. Herewith a few more suggestions and opinions on other vocations, groups and personality types who seriously pisses me off.
Before some, by reading this post, blow every capillary in their bodies and start bleeding profusely out of their eye-sockets and ears I refer you to my second post on my blog titled “A friendly Warning.”
Psychiatrist and Psycho-analysts — Should be forced to watch the synapses in their own brains open and close, on closed-circuit television, after their craniums have been surgically removed (on second thoughts a meat-cleaver will work just as well) and their brains injected with a painful blue fluid, as to be able to monitor the function, before they dare to put their theories about the human thought processes forward as a science to be taken serious and worth a lot of money.
Snobs and Know-it-alls — Like in the movie Clockwork Orange they should be forced to listen to their whining and opinionated views over and over for every second of every day on the highest volume possible until their eyes turn into stone in their sockets…and then be decapitated.
TV Evangelists — Should be flogged publicly with thick, knotted ropes until they confess that they are only in it for the money and silently terrified of Her wrath for their treachery. Oh…and She is black by the way.
Jehovah’s Witnesses — Should be forced to watch the vilest pornographic videos imaginable, every hour on the hour, preferably Oriental ones that have the word Bukake somewhere in the title, before they come and tell me I need to be saved.
Clerics and Missionaries — Should be shot on sight. They are responsible for the spread of religion and therefore accountable for more causalities than all the wars, diseases and natural disasters that ever plagued this planet put together.
Society and Gossip Columnists — Should be forced to read articles written by someone else and not to be used as reference material by them. That alone would be sufficient torture.
Paparazzi — Should be forced, on a daily basis, to take at least 5 spools of film of the inside of their sphincters i.e. their cameras and their heads should be shoved up their arses, at the same time, daily. (Note that as with journalists I do not include all the brave souls who put their lives on the line continuously to expose imperialism, oppression, dictatorships and unjust wars in this opinion)
Newspaper Editors — Should be forced to confess on live television and radio that they, regularly, actually do confuse running a newspaper with running a country and that this delusion of grandeur leads to editorial opinions.
Generals of any Defence Force — Should be buggered mercilessly until they acknowledge that dressing up in their monkey-suits, with all the ribbons and qualifications for the world to see, actually belong in cub-scout movements and that they should not be taken serious by anyone at all because of this. And that they really enjoy being buggered because that was the sole reason why they joined in the first place.
Political Analysts — Admit it. You are closet accountants that do not have a grasp of mathematics and thus had to find an equally boring career.
Television Personalities — Blessed with too many, too healthy teeth which led to a calcium deficiency that arrested development of the brain at an early age. My condolences.
I will work on some more for a weekly input and will try to offend everyone. Fair is fair.
Before some, by reading this post, blow every capillary in their bodies and start bleeding profusely out of their eye-sockets and ears I refer you to my second post on my blog titled “A friendly Warning.”
Psychiatrist and Psycho-analysts — Should be forced to watch the synapses in their own brains open and close, on closed-circuit television, after their craniums have been surgically removed (on second thoughts a meat-cleaver will work just as well) and their brains injected with a painful blue fluid, as to be able to monitor the function, before they dare to put their theories about the human thought processes forward as a science to be taken serious and worth a lot of money.
Snobs and Know-it-alls — Like in the movie Clockwork Orange they should be forced to listen to their whining and opinionated views over and over for every second of every day on the highest volume possible until their eyes turn into stone in their sockets…and then be decapitated.
TV Evangelists — Should be flogged publicly with thick, knotted ropes until they confess that they are only in it for the money and silently terrified of Her wrath for their treachery. Oh…and She is black by the way.
Jehovah’s Witnesses — Should be forced to watch the vilest pornographic videos imaginable, every hour on the hour, preferably Oriental ones that have the word Bukake somewhere in the title, before they come and tell me I need to be saved.
Clerics and Missionaries — Should be shot on sight. They are responsible for the spread of religion and therefore accountable for more causalities than all the wars, diseases and natural disasters that ever plagued this planet put together.
Society and Gossip Columnists — Should be forced to read articles written by someone else and not to be used as reference material by them. That alone would be sufficient torture.
Paparazzi — Should be forced, on a daily basis, to take at least 5 spools of film of the inside of their sphincters i.e. their cameras and their heads should be shoved up their arses, at the same time, daily. (Note that as with journalists I do not include all the brave souls who put their lives on the line continuously to expose imperialism, oppression, dictatorships and unjust wars in this opinion)
Newspaper Editors — Should be forced to confess on live television and radio that they, regularly, actually do confuse running a newspaper with running a country and that this delusion of grandeur leads to editorial opinions.
Generals of any Defence Force — Should be buggered mercilessly until they acknowledge that dressing up in their monkey-suits, with all the ribbons and qualifications for the world to see, actually belong in cub-scout movements and that they should not be taken serious by anyone at all because of this. And that they really enjoy being buggered because that was the sole reason why they joined in the first place.
Political Analysts — Admit it. You are closet accountants that do not have a grasp of mathematics and thus had to find an equally boring career.
Television Personalities — Blessed with too many, too healthy teeth which led to a calcium deficiency that arrested development of the brain at an early age. My condolences.
I will work on some more for a weekly input and will try to offend everyone. Fair is fair.
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